http://www.nygirlofmydreams.com/

Sweeeeeeeeeeet!

Today had been a bad day for me. Nothing particularly significant happened. Maybe just so.

It's just a feeling, you get frustrated with yourself and everyone else, you want to be left alone but yet you want someone beside.

Dad brought home some souvenirs that elder cousin brought from Australia. She brought me a pair of cutesy piggy earrings, about the size of half a 10cent. Yes, I appreciated it but characters like pigs and such are just more than a tad sensitive to people like me, it's just almost my instinct to say out to my parents " Why she bought me a pig?!", in a jokingly way I SWEAR. Then, the super playful dad gave cousin a call to tell her what I've said. GREAT. I superrrrrrrrrrr supeerrrrrrrrrrr hate this kind of thing, like he told her that she told her that he told her what I said. Because the intended meaning is always misintepreted and i haaaaaaaaaaaateeee to be mistaken.

Please anyone and everyone. If I'm ever too stingy with my words, encouragement, praise, please please tell me. I'm just not used to saying them. I dont like to say thanks-s and sorry-s because I think those are what should be felt and not said. But I will, from now on, if it makes someone's day. And bimbs like me dont even think before talking, please also tell me if my words are too blunt.

Urrghhhhh. Feeling so jaded.................................
Tell me that everything's going to be tommorrow yea.
Rina Rina fight fight fight!

Not the most updated version.
The spread across the cover (2 folds) of a booklet.

mole says:
LIFE
mole says:
so vulnerable
熊熊 twenty twenty young and pretty says:
if i die
熊熊 twenty twenty young and pretty says:
how
熊熊 twenty twenty young and pretty says:
u also set a account of me okay
熊熊 twenty twenty young and pretty says:
everyday give me a comment
熊熊 twenty twenty young and pretty says:
steady?
mole says:
i set up a blog for u also
mole says:
den use my ASHES-memorial n services
mole says:
JUST FOR U
熊熊 twenty twenty young and pretty says:
huh
熊熊 twenty twenty young and pretty says:
that...no need la
mole says:
need need
mole says:
i make ur urn like drumstick
熊熊 twenty twenty young and pretty says:
NO
mole says:
or into rubic cube
mole says:
or disco balls
mole says:
den have ur funeral in a unconvention way
mole says:
disco lightings n all
熊熊 twenty twenty young and pretty says:
wahhh
熊熊 twenty twenty young and pretty says:
parttttyy sia
mole says:
den red carpet for ur coffin's arrival
mole says:
Yeapo
mole says:
den when all the guests arrive
mole says:
Jas Xian Me fly to Thailand for hols
mole says:
if got enough money left buy a redbull singlet
mole says:
den wrap it on ur tombstone
mole says:
COVER ur tombstone
mole says:
just in case ur picture scares other ppl
mole says:
SWEET ENOUGH?

I think I might be one of the saddest and emo-iest teen turning twenty. I don't know why. But turning twenty have been making me think alot. Alot made some sense. Alot are just pure nonsense.

Like:
Scenario 1
Say, 30 years later. When I'm fifty fifty, old and saggy. I'll be telling my son(if I ever get married).
"Ah boy ah. 妈妈十九岁就出来打拼了啊!"

The thought that I'm already starting to work at the age of 19 didn't feel good. 19's probably the age when all teens are young and havoc. Doing nothings but play away. Or even mugging hard in Uni to get themselves a degree. And the thought that I'll probably be stopping at a diploma feels a tad...我很没有用.

And turning twenty made me feel old. I can't play and hop around(not literally) anymore. I've just got to tone down and be a quiet old 20 yr-old. (okay, this dont really make sense)

And and, as much as I hated being a 20, everyone's been reminding me that I'm 20 with all the "Happy 20th Birthday...Welcome to the big-2 family." Grrr.

And there's more, but I shant be so emo.

---

Anyway, I'm happy and thankful enough to receive wishes from all those who matters to me. Some went for Seoul Garden lunch with me but my actual motive is to make them fat so I wont be...JUST KIDDING. Some went Indulgz with me and 串通 with the waiter to hide my cake. Some texted me. One called me in the middle of the night, waking me up from my beauty sleeeep. BUT! 谢谢大家！

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And today, the gfs had something secretive going on. But I'm so clever I saw through all their plan. But not the cake one and the dress. They bought me the dress that I've been eyeing on and i thought that was all. Then came the cake which I thought was on the house. They actually baked me a brownie! or is it a cake? HAHAH. I'm not good in expressing...but the cake filled with 满满的爱和牛油，我吃到了！Muacks! Muacks! Muacks! 感动到~ ~ For the next bday girl, we have decided to bake huat-kuay, kueh lapis and....

twenty twenty, old and fatty.
twenty twenty, old and lonely.

twenty.